{"id":1497,"date":"2019-09-22T11:11:07","date_gmt":"2019-09-22T15:11:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/?p=1497"},"modified":"2019-09-22T10:35:53","modified_gmt":"2019-09-22T14:35:53","slug":"mayas-voice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/?p=1497","title":{"rendered":"Maya’s voice"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

I remember giving birth to each of my children.\u00a0 The immediate, intense love was like that of no other.\u00a0 This love was an incredible force that surged through my entire being.\u00a0 As new as these babies were, it was if I had known them forever.\u00a0 What a precious moment; I wanted to freeze time.\u00a0 At the same time, I was ever so curious.\u00a0 Who would they become?\u00a0 My intention had been to savor each moment of their becoming.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Friends who had babies before me would share, \u201cas much as\nyou love them now, just know, your love will grow and you\u2019ll love them more.\u201d  \u201cHow could this possibly be?\u201d I\nwondered.  Time, of course, could not\nfreeze.  I am not sure about my capacity\nto love more but I think that the love gets deeper.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are some parallels with what I am experiencing\nnow.  There are moments again, where I\nwould like to freeze time.  This way, the\nmemories remain fresher and somehow, I imagine that I would feel more connected\nto my daughter.  Time again, cannot\nfreeze.  Missing Maya is brutal.  How can I even miss her more?  We are approaching four years since she took\nher life.  The missing gets deeper.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Earlier this month, we hosted seven women from Nepal, survivors of trafficking along with about a dozen teens from New Paltz.\u00a0 Sharing meals, a hike and stories, the day was filled with depth.\u00a0 The stories were traumatic.\u00a0 We were not reading anecdotes from a book, watching a documentary, or learning of the horrors from a screen.\u00a0 It was in our living room that voices were shared.\u00a0 As we spent more time with one another, laughed, experienced the beauty of nature and new friendships, I had hope.\u00a0 My heart was filled to be part of fertilizing the ground to nurture awareness on such an intimate level and build human connections.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Just a few days ago, I was in awe as I listened to the voice\nof the youth both locally and across the world during the climate strikes.  The youth are rising.  It was a day of passion, education, advocacy,\ncreativity and hope. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

While feeling so grateful for the waves of hope and change, I also carry the waves of grief and longing.\u00a0 Maya ought to be here.\u00a0 Her voice is missing.\u00a0 I think about Maya\u2019s voice.\u00a0 The voice that I heard before she was born, tapping me on the shoulder, letting me know she had to arrive. \u00a0I think of her voice in her 15 years of life.\u00a0 A beautiful and sensitive voice, a fun spirit, of compassion and social justice.\u00a0 I now hold her voice with deep curiosity. \u00a0Was taking her life a way to express her voice?\u00a0 What is the message, what was Maya trying to say?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I remember giving birth to each of my children.\u00a0 The immediate, intense love was like that of no other.\u00a0 This love was an incredible force that surged through my entire being.\u00a0 As new as these babies were, it was if I had known them forever.\u00a0 What a precious moment; I wanted to freeze time.\u00a0 At…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1497","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gifts-since"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p720L0-o9","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1497","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1497"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1497\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1503,"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1497\/revisions\/1503"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1497"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1497"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mayasgifts.elisegold.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1497"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}