Fog
The drive through the fog this morning was a mirror of my life.
Truly, unchartered territory. Layers of gray, uncertain of what lies ahead.
Deeply in it; in the thick of it. Feeling what is, and curiously, looking ahead.
Will I get there? Where is there? Will I see clearly again?
Creeping along slowly, cautiously, without being able to see what is in front of me.
And then, as I approached the next foot, yard, stretch, I saw color.
The lichen’s sage hue on the trees popped out like never before.
I’m enveloped by the mist and I have hope.
a card that Maya made for her friend, Chloe at about age 8
Thank you, Elise.
Rabbi Jonathan, your guidance continues to help me through the fog. Thank you and love.
I was thinking of you and Maya today and read a couple of your earlier entries. We only barely know each other; but in the pictures of Maya I see the faces of my own girls – of other children – and know that I can’t even begin to imagine, as a parent, what you and Mathew are enduring. It is not my nature to share the way you are doing and so I feel a bit voyeuristic reading these posts, but I hope knowing that others are thinking of you and feeling for you gives comfort.
Teri, thank you. I really appreciate hearing from you. We are mirroring one another as I see your girls and others, and I see Maya. I don’t how we are enduring, yet we are. I strongly believe that it is you and others that are helping us as we maneuver through the fog.
Elise, Thank you for your amazing courage. You are making me (and I’m sure others) a better person. I’ll never fully know your pain but the beauty with which you share your hurt and your love continues to crack my heart wider and wider open. I’m noticing I’m becoming a more compassionate being these past months. Your loss has hit so many of us hard. It will never be ok and it will have to be ok.. And I’m just so sorry your little girl is not here in the way you deserve her to be. Keep fighting, keep feeling, keep unknowing, keep sharing, keep loving and keep letting us hold you. Loving you, Mathew, Adin, Sasha and Maya. With all my heart!
Deep, deep thanks, dear Dara.
Thank you Elise for continuing to post such beautiful thoughts. I know you’re touching many hearts and many lives. I love this post about fog and how The fog can come, the fog can go and for a brief moment one can see clearly. And then just as quickly it can settle back in. This is life; and I hate that you are going through such a painful experience. I hate being unable to do anything more then be there with you in my heart and my thoughts and my prayers. I wear a bracelet on my wrist now every day that says “one day at a time “. As there have been many challenges this year in our life, this is something that was given to me. At times I replace “One day at a time with “one hour at a time”, and even “one hour with one minute”. There are just some days that is the only way to make it through, being present in the moment. Until we get a chance to talk, whenever that time comes, please know you are always being thought of and lifted up in prayer in our home. Love, hugs, and positive thoughts always to you, Mathew Adin and Sasha
Dear Lani…and from one moment, to one breath. Thank you for lifting us. Love you.
dear Elise,
I’m reading every post. Sending lots and lots of love. ~ Maddy
Thank you, Maddy.