Mothering and daughtering
October 2013.
Dear Maya,
You are growing into your 13. I’m not sure what that means, but I’m witnessing it. Perhaps it means that you are more comfortable in finding yourself, the Maya that you’ve been with until now and at the same time, stretching and being more grown up. Before that, I think you wanted to shed the “old Maya” and push anything/anyone away that reminded you of her. Now, you are dressing in clothes that are more form fitting. You straighten your hair and you wear make-up daily. You have been kinder to me. That is more than welcome!
We recently went on an amazing journey (both together and apart). We participated in the Mothering and Daughtering Workshop at Omega offered by Sil and Eliza Reynolds. You resisted going. I gave it to you as part of your birthday present and you claimed that it was really for me. I felt it was really for us.
As it turns out, you enjoyed it thoroughly. We commuted, rather than stay as overnight guests. When it was time to leave at the end of the day, you wanted to stay as late as possible. What is even more exciting is that Eliza invited you to be an assistant of hers. That means you need to be trained. So that means that you and I get to go to more of these workshops (and stay overnight for free)!
Eliza really saw something in you. She got it; she got you! When the daughters were off and separate from the mothers, she would do some presenting. All of the girls would discuss and share relevant, meaningful words. Then along comes YOU. You offered sparkly pearls of wisdom. Eliza said that you would take each discussion to another level. Why am I not surprised?
Anyway, what a gift. A true gift for us both. Not only do we get to do these workshops, but we get to practice the good work in between. There were wonderful aspects of the teachings:
- Matriline
- Intuition
- Communication
- Trust
- Giving and receiving
- Celebrating, and on, and on.
One little sidebar…I am inspired to go eventually go back further than my great grandmother. Who is she? And who was her mom? And her mom?
- ?
- ?
- ?
- Zlota
- Bella
- Anita (Nina)
- Elise
- Maya
December 2015- reflections
As I reread, recall and share the stories from my “Maya Journals”, I naturally cherish the memories. They fill me. This story evoked a different feeling; one of profound emptiness. Actually, it’s not the memory itself; it is the reminder that we are at the end of our matriline.
P.S. Though this may look like a perfectly serious photograph, I remember the pose was struck in jest, as the photo was taken for Mathew.
I’m thinking of you, Elise, and all the facets of your grief and memories. Thank you for sharing your writing.
End of the matriline?? For now? Perhaps, but there is no end on all the different roles we play for each other in our tribalines, and that is something worth holding on to, dear Elise. May I share a glimpse into my mother/daughter story? When I was about 24 yrs old, about 7 years out from losing my mother, I had a reading because I was lost without my mother, and wanted connection. I remember that my whole life I had lived with the determination that my mother would always live with me… that there was nothing I wouldn’t do for her when I became an adult.
Then she died.
The first thing the person doing my reading said was, that in other lives where my mother was predominantly playing the mother role, I had taken to being abusive, and that when it came time to enacting my soul contract for this lifetime, my souls intention was to come back and make it up to her… Big time!! So, are you following me??? Yes, I was not to get the satisfaction of, and yearning for correcting my past behaviour towards her.
This information answered so much of what my heart was suffering at the time, and I understood the karmic lesson. So, the end of this lifetime matriline… Yes, but by no means the end of the tribal line. I love you, Mercedes
Maya was such a special human being, and everyone saw it. As a daughter, a sister, a friend, a teacher, a student, a caregiver, a granddaughter, niece and cousin, a mentor, and on it goes. I am so profoundly sorry, Elise, for this most excruciating loss.
I love you dearly,
Jody
What a great mom you are that you provided to promote this experience for the two of you. And clearly, Maya’s heart was open and soul deep.
If we consider past lives and eternity, are we not at the end of our matriline?
Thanks for sharing this. Your photographs are amazing. Love you
The Mothering Daughtering workshops, and time integrating the work, fed us both. I appreciate your thoughts about the matriline. Mercedes, too, offered a similar insight. Thank you and love you.
I am so sorry you have lost your beautiful in every way daughter Elise.
Thank you for sharing these meaningful memories with us. It makes me realize how precious every moment we have with our kids is.
Love both,
Sadia